From Jeremiah Burroughs

A great quote from The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment (which I'm slowly making my way through!), for when we are struggling for contentment in the circumstances God has put us in:

The difference between what a godly man has and a wicked man, is this: a godly man is as a child in an inn, an inn-keeper has his child in the house, and provides his diet, and lodging, and what is needful for him. Now a stranger comes, and he has dinner and supper provided, and lodging, but the stranger must pay for everything. It may be that the child's fare is meaner than the fare of the stranger; the stranger has boiled and roast and baked, but he must pay for it, there must come a reckoning for it. Just so it is: many of God's people have only mean fare, but God as a Father provides it, and it is free of cost, they need not pay for what they have, it is paid for before; but the wicked in all their pomp, and pride, and finery: they have what they ask for, but there must come a reckoning for everything, they must pay for all at the conclusion, and is it not better to have a little free of cost, than to have to pay for everything? Grace shows a man that what he has, he has free of cost, from God as from a Father, and therefore it must needs be very sweet.

10 Questions for Pastors' Wives

Today we continue with our series 10 Questions for Pastors' Wives interviewing Alison Hamilton. Alison is married to Scott Hamilton who is senior pastor of Harvest Bible Chapel, a new church plant in Glasgow, Scotland.

1. What do you think is your most important responsibility as a pastor's wife?

To be a good wife - to love and submit to our husbands and therefore to God. Ephesians 5v22-24

2. Is there anything that you think is not part of your role that others may assume is?

Can't think of anything specifically that people have assumed that is part of my role!

3. What boundaries have you established in order to protect your marriage and family life?

I think this has been more relevant for Scott - he tries to make sure that we are in together one evening, he would be fairly clear that people don't think they can just pop in anytime they fancy to our house. I Probably need to make sure I watch my tongue - not to be grumbling and complaining about Scott.... not that I ever would!! - It is not a helpful or Godly example to set.

4. How do you apply Galatians 6:2 ("Carry each other's burdens") when facing difficulties or frustrations in ministry?

In prayer and encouragement from God's word.

5. Where do you and your husband find your own pastoral care?

From other pastors and their wives who are friends.

6. How do you deal with criticism of you or your husband?

We need to exam the criticism for a grain of truth, then hand it over to the Lord recognising that he is control of all things and that he probably wants to grow me in my understanding of his love and forgiveness which he expects me to mirror in return to the source of the criticism even if it is untrue or unfair.

7. What is the greatest blessing and what the greatest burden of being a pastor's wife?

Seeing people grow in their walks with the Lord, especially my husband, and the encouragement that is. Greatest burden - frustration of seeing people make unwise choices and the effects that they can have on others.

8. Are there any books you would recommend that you've found particularly helpful as a pastor’s wife?

I don't think I've ever actually read a book about being a pastors wife - but as I think the most important thing about being a pastors wife is being a good and godly wife - some helpful marriage books are- Love that Lasts by Gary and Betsy Ricucci and When sinners say I do by Dave Harvey.

9. What one piece of advice would you pass on to a new pastor's wife?

Someone said to me and a bunch of pastors and wives recently that we should make sure that our marriages are the best in the church - so invest in your marriage - recognise that you are both sinners but have a great Saviour, that submission, forgiveness and humility are God's way and although difficult at times and certainly not cultural responses - due to the pride in our hearts will bring God's peace. That God is always sovereign and in control - even when things seem like they are spiraling out of control and that God's ways are not being honoured - he has his plans and purposes in all situations which are far more complex than we can ever understand or see.

10. How can the other women in a congregation best support you practically and in prayer?

By being in a healthy discipling, accountable relationships with some of them. That they would encourage me in my walk with the Lord to know love God more to pray 2 Thessalonians 1 v 11-12, also in my marriage - to love and serve my husband and family.

10 Questions for Pastors' Wives

A little while back, Nicki's husband Colin had a series on his blog called "10 Questions for Expositors". We have unashamedly stolen his idea and have sent a set of questions to a number of pastors' wives. The aim of this is to inspire and encourage women who are married to a pastor or to a seminary student. Also we want to give other women an insight into the challenges that pastors' wives face so we can better encourage and pray for those in leadership.

So let's start things off with our first pastor's wife! My dear friend Melissa ministers along side her husband Mike, who is Associate Pastor at Uptown Church, Charlotte, NC. Here are her responses:

1. What do you think is your most important responsibility as a pastor's wife?

Truthfully, my most important responsibility is to abide in Christ, keeping Him always first in my heart.

2. Is there anything that you think is not part of your role that others may assume is?

Hopefully, they don’t want me to sing! : ) The reality is that I can never be all things to all people. Whenever people expect you to fill all their needs (what can only be done in Christ), ultimately you will fail. That has been a tough lesson for me – letting go of what other people think I should be doing and do what Christ has called me to do. Also, learning to value people’s insight, but let go of their opinions.

3. What boundaries have you established in order to protect your marriage and family life?

The first: daily time with the Lord. If this boundary is established, I really believe all the other boundaries will fall into place.

The second boundary: all commitments should be done for God’s glory, not man’s approval. There is always more ministry to be done. We should labor with all diligence, but for God’s glory, not our own.

4. How do you apply Galatians 6:2 ("Carry each other's burdens") when facing difficulties or frustrations in ministry?

My husband is my best friend. When I’m frustrated, he listens. When he’s frustrated, I listen. Also, in the listening trying to speak the truth lovingly. Giving calm advice to one another that encourages peace within the body.

5. Where do you and your husband find your own pastoral care?

This has been difficult for us at times. What I can say with all truthfulness is that God provides the care we need, just when we need it. It has come from people in our church, books we have read, sermons on line… He provides in a variety of ways.

6. How do you deal with criticism of you or your husband?

I attempt to deal with it patiently and lovingly. Many criticisms are misunderstandings, so I try to listen to what they are saying. For other criticisms, it is always good to be open to our need to change, as well as the fact that our husbands are not perfect.

7. What is the greatest blessing and what the greatest burden of being a pastor's wife?

Greatest blessing – getting to spend our lives building Christ’s kingdom. It really is an honor to get to do the work of the gospel full time.

Greatest challenge – loneliness… not from being with people, but from being understood by people. It is a very different life from most of my friends, so at times I feel the loneliness of that.

8. Are there any books you would recommend that you've found particularly helpful as a pastor’s wife?

True Woman, Susan Hunt; When Life & Belief Collide, Carolyn James; Anything by Elisabeth Elliot; Suffering & the Sovereignty of God, Various Authors, edited by John Piper and Justin Taylor.

9. What one piece of advice would you pass on to a new pastor's wife?

You can only minister to others what you know to be true yourself. Know the Lord.

10. How can the other women in a congregation best support you practically and in prayer?

Praying for our marriage and children. Praying that the Lord would keep us from temptation and allow us to live lives set apart that bring Him glory. Pray that He would keep us faithful in all things with what He has entrusted to us.

Audio for Pastor's Wives

Recently at the 2009 Sovereign Grace Pastor's Conference two seminars were given for pastor's wives that are worth listening to.

• The Pastor’s Wife and Culture: What Feminism Has Done to Femininity by Carolyn McCulley.
• The Pastor’s Wife and Ministry Opportunities: Five Great Deals She Won’t Want to Miss by Carolyn Mahaney.

More about prayer...

Yet it is not an easy thing to pray. There is a price to be paid, a price of curbed freedom, of resolute concentration, of agonizing supplication. Prayer is the acid test of devotion. To stay in the presence of God and to wait upon him, bearing your soul to His searching gaze, costs everything. The one who prays must be transformed. Prayer must make him holier, purer, more Christ-like. Prayer is a purifying medium.

Colin Peckham, from Sounds from Heaven, The Revival on the Isle of Lewis 1949-1952.

If God Already Knows, Why Pray?

It's not often these days that I have a "eureka moment" but recently it happened to me while I was reading a book about prayer. You probably know the feeling; you read something and suddenly something previously obtuse becomes crystal-clear. Now I've read a few books on prayer in my time, and some of them were quite good. But If God Already Knows Why Pray by Douglas Kelly is definitely the one of the best.

It is written in a very readable style, full of excellent illustrations and helpful stories. Dr Kelly follows the structure of the Lord's prayer and answers the question he poses in the book's title. He first deals with "If God already knows" under the headings of "Prayer depends on who God is", "Prayer and the praise of God" and "Prayer and the purposes of God". The next section deals with the "why pray", because "Prayer changes us" and "Prayer changes others". Part 3 then talks about "Our problems and God's solutions", discussing "The challenge to persevere", "Wrestling in prayer" and "When God appears to say no".

The section I found most helpful (and the source of my personal revelation!) discussed the divine initiative in prayer. Dr Kelly explains how

"God has specifically chosen to use the prayers of His saints (which they base on His written word) for His name to be glorified and His will to be done."

I believed this to be true in my head, but this did not energise me when it actually came down to the praying. Dr Kelly goes on to explain how

"effective prayers start in heaven and are sent down to us by God himself"

and after reading this section I really started to understand what this means.

"The risen Christ is interceding for us in heaven (Hebrews 7:24-28). The Spirit is there with Him, because the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit are always together. And that same Spirit 'also helps us in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered' (Romans 8:26).

The Spirit leaves the throne where Jesus is praying and comes down into the believer's heart where he begins to re-echo the intercessions of Jesus. It is as though the Holy Spirit places a mirror inside our hearts and turns it in such a direction that it reflects back to heaven the deepest desires of the interceding Christ."

Eureka! Well, for me at least. If you feel you need some insights to fire up your prayer life, then read this book. Be warned, your prayers may never be the same again.

Modesty

I've just discovered a new webzine over at Next . This month particularly has a worthwhile read in Lydia Brownback's article, The Single Woman and the Modesty of Personal Restraint:

As the spring season blooms, talk about modesty heats up in Christian conversation as fast as the weather. Bloggers, radio hosts, and the rest of us lament the shorter hemlines, deeper necklines, exposed bellies, and bare bottoms in thong bikinis at the neighborhood swim club. But immodesty deals with a lot more than revealing too much skin. We are just as prone—if not more so—to overexpose what’s under our skin. Revealing too much about ourselves is immodest too. When Peter painted his picture of godly womanhood, it included outward modesty—how we handle “the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing”—but it also included the modesty of personal restraint—“a gentle and quiet spirit,” which, he said, is very precious in God’s sight (1 Pet. 3:4).

Read on here. You'll also find further resources on the Next site with a bunch of conference messages from over the years on various subjects and from top notch speakers.

Bible Overview

If you're looking for some good bible overview sermons I'd thoroughly recommend these ones by Mark Dever from Capitol Hill Baptist Church. Go on, pick a book and start listening.

• New Testament Overview

• Old Testament Overview

He saw the first time

I all too easily get discouraged when a task I have just completed soon needs to be done again. The washing, the dirty dishes, meals; I'm sure you can add your own list. So I found this quote from Helen Roseveare very helpful. She is describing her time at WEC mission headquarters, where she went in preparation for going to the Congo as a mission doctor.

I was told to go and wash the cement floor of the toilets and bathroom on the women candidate's floor. I found a bucket and a brush, and set to...I scrubbed out the first toilet and started on the second. A candidate entered the first with muddy shoes. The floor was still wet. When she left, I returned and did the first again. Meanwhile, someone else entered the second. This continued for some little time with a rising sense of frustration. I'd never get them clean! I'd fail, my very first day in training, to achieve the task I was set. Tears pricked at my eyes. I scrubbed on, muttering, 'Devil, get out of here! Devil, get out of here!'

Someone came in, and standing still a moment watching me, heard my muttered comments. She laughed and startled me. 'Now I understand why our cakes are all burnt today!' she exclaimed. 'We're in the kitchen underneath, and you're sending the devil down to us!' She left amused. But there was another quiet spectator, Elizabeth, who was in charge of the candidates and who had given me this task. After a short pause, she gently asked me why I was so upset. I explained the cause of my frustration. 'For whom are you scrubbing this floor?' she replied. 'Why for you, of course; you sent me here.' I've never forgotten her answer. 'No, my dear. If you are doing it for me, you may as well go home. You'll never satisfy me. You're doing it for the Lord, and He saw the first time you cleaned it. That now is tomorrow's dirt.'

From Give Me This Mountain by Helen Roseveare.